01-01-10

"I know I'm still lucky to be in this situation... But the mere fact that I can't stop thinking of what could've been makes me feel oh so sad. Like I said, it's always a choice to be happy. But what if even happiness won't make itself an option? I guess it's just something I have to deal with... and all that's left to do is pray that in the long run, I will learn to get used to it."

4:30 PM, New Year's Eve

Bus Stop 27451

while waiting for the bus to the nearest shopping mall

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010!!!

Fine. You're favorite line.

Want me to prove to you a lot could happen in just 10 days? Read on.

I have already moved out yesterday. It was once just a plan I never thought I’d really do. I am the type of person who does not easily give up but when I’m told to, I do. "Someone has to say it."

If you read below, I said ten days ago that I was pissed off with the situation and not the person. But after I talked to the person and tried to fix things up, and even tried to ask help for me not to give up, I am now angry with both the situation and unfortunately, with the person. And you know what? I just realized that when it’s pride you’re fighting with, it’ll knock you down. And it’s a slap on your face when pride reigns over love. Some people claim it’s all they got. The question is, has it done something good to you and to the people around you? If yes, were you really happy? Or just pretending to be happy? You wonder what’s wrong. Have you ever thought that maybe it’s because of your pride everything has gone wrong?

Ugh

Well good luck to you and your pride. May it give you the happiness you think your unworthy family cannot give you. May you live happily ever after.

Unhappy

This afternoon, two of us from the company were interviewed by representatives from Personal Excellence about how it is living and working in Singapore. One of the questions was, "What motivated you to come here in Singapore?"

Then I just remembered WHO motivated me, and not WHAT. And unfortunately that person who was my main reason for coming here, is so far away from me right now. So near, yet so far. I'm afraid I might be giving up on this person. This person is just too strong to handle. It has been eight days and during these days I've been trying to find the perfect time to break the ice. But every time I try to, I keep seeing reasons not to. Not yet.

My heart is enraged. Not because of this person, but because of what I have to deal with right now. My family is my weakness. I may be coward at times, but in my mind and in my heart I would always try to defend whoever hurts anyone in my family. But the hardest part is when 'whoever' is also part of the family, the closest to me.

I really don't know what to do. I am so caught in the middle of a situation I never wanted to happen. I wonder why I had to deal with my mother's feelings all by myself. For a week I have been shedding tears every time I think of what's happening with my family right now. And it sucks giving my parents some false hope. It'll only be me who's coming home, Ma.

It's funny how someone you hate could make you turn against your family and blaming them for something they didn't even want to happen.

Well, a decision has been made. I just hope it won't make the situation worse. But to be honest? It's going to get worse. I'm just so scared.

We'll see what happens in the next few days or months.. If I continue to be unhappy here, I will move out. I know it's risky but I know it'll be easier that way. And I know so well that it'll be my loss. I'd rather live alone than live with someone who's mad at me and my family, someone who thinks that going home is not worth it. I wish she realizes how this is hurting me, how this is gonna affect my parents, and how I have to deal with my parents' feelings, something she claimed she does not care about. My friends say she's just mad. I know she's a smart person and I've always believed in her. But I don't know why this time I feel like she's making a huge mistake.

Pardon me for my scattered thoughts, I'm just so lost right now and unhappy.

The Update I Owe You

Remember I told you I'd be leaving for Singapore last May 6? Yeah. I left Philippines and after 60 days, I went back. If you only knew how frustrated I was looking for a job and then ended up going back home. But you know what I love about life? Surprises. While I was back home, I got an email. I got hired! So two weeks later, I flew right back to Singapore. It felt like heaven having been hired. God has finally blessed me with a job here in Singapore. I actually work as a Systems Analyst at JobsCentral Pte Ltd. I recently just finished my probation last week. And so, here I am... A regular employee after three months.

I'm starting to get the taste of real life. Work gets stressful sometimes, and ugh... BUDGET! And sometimes, I really miss the people back home. But what keeps me going is the fact that God gives me blessings which I am and will be forever thankful for. I'm so thankful that my first job is here in Singapore. They say I'm lucky. I say I'm blessed. *winks*

This is just a short update and I hope these pictures will fill you in. ^_^

our room

oh yes. i am in singapore. haha

me and my sister during her birthday celebration last Sept 18 @ Forbidden City

my IT teammates

my Jobscentral family

Paintball, anyone?

Here's an update: Guys, I am now working as a Systems Analyst here in Singapore. And just last month, we had our annual team building in the IT department. Guess what we did for fun? PAINTBALL! It was my first time to play paintball! I really had so much fun even if I already got tired in the first few minutes of the game. HAHA! Paintball is a very interesting game you guys might wanna try.

Not being satisfied by just playing, I tried to search anything about paintball online and I came across this website that sells paintball guns and gears. Okay, it's not that I am planning to buy gears now. But still, I wanna share to those people who might be interested, especially GUYS! haha! To those who would want to buy the guns and gears at just one purchase, you can buy the spyder victor paintball gun package. OR if you really wanna make the most out of your paintball game and be totally ready for it, you can try the spyder extra, for some additional items.

I know right? If you wanna have fun you really have to invest on what you love. And hey, paintball is all worth the investment! Enjoy! Aim and fire! *winks*

1234... I LOVE YOU

1234 - Plain White T's
lyrics

1-2-1-2-3-4
Give me more loving than I’ve ever had
Make me feel better when I’m feeling sad
Tell me I’m special even though I know I’m not
Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Barely getting mad
I’m so glad I found you
I love being around you
You make it easy
Its as easy as 1-2-1-2-3-4
There’s only one thing
To Do
Three words
For you
(I love you) I love you
There’s only one way to say
Those three words
That’s what I’ll do
(I love you) I love you
Give me more loving from the very start
Piece me back together when I fall apart
Tell me things you never even tell your closest friends
Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
You’re the best that I’ve had
And I’m so glad I found you
I love being around you
You make it easy
It’s easy as 1-2-1-2-3-4
There’s only one thing
To Do
Three words
For you
(I love you) I love you
There’s only one way to say
Those three words
That’s what I’ll do
(I love you) I love you
(I love you) I love you
You make it easy
It’s easy as 1 2 1 2 3 4
There’s only one thing
To Do
Three words
For you
(I love you) I love you
There’s only one way to say
Those three words
That’s what I’ll do
(I love you) I love you
(I love you) I love you
1-2-3-4
I love you
(I love you) I love you

Finally!

Agnes Prochina Domingo
BS Computer Science Major in Information Technology
Xavier University - Ateneo de Cagayan
Batch 2009

Yes, friends. I have finally graduated in college! After 15 years of studying, i'm finally done w/ school! Wohoooo! And now, i'm unemployed but I hope I won't stay that way forever. On May 6, i'll be leaving for Singapore. I just wanna try my luck there. The thought of leaving this place and the people I love breaks my heart. But then, life has to go on. It's not like i'm no longer coming back here in the Philippines, right? But oh... I will miss everyone! But on the bright side, I'm kinda excited about S'pore. I wonder how it is to be living there with my sister (who actually works as the HR Operations Executive of Unilever, SG). Questions like "Will I meet someone special there? Am I going to stay there forever? Is S'pore my destiny?" cross my mind. Weee! This is gonna be exciting. *winks* Well I guess I can update you when i'm there.

I really have a lot to share. Maybe next time.

Anyway, CONGRATULATIONS to me and my fellow graduates!

Again

AGAIN by Janet Jackson
This one's for you =)

I heard from a friend today
And she said you were in town
Suddenly the memories came back to me in my mind

How can I be strong I've asked myself
Time and time I've said
That I'll never fall in love with you again

A wounded heart you gave,
My soul you took away
Good intentions you had many,
I know you did
I come from a place that hurts,
and God knows how I've cried
And I never want to return
Never fall again
Making love to you oh it felt so good and oh so right

How can I be strong I've asked myself
Time and time I've said
That I'll never fall in love with you again

So here we are alone again,
Didn't think it'd come to this
And to know it all began
With just a little kiss
I've come too close to happiness,
To have it swept away
Don't think I can take the pain
Never fall again

Kinda late in the game
And my heart is in your hands
Don't you stand there and then tell me
You love me
Then leave again
'Cause I'm falling in love with you again

Hold me, hold me
Don't ever let me go
Say it just one time
Say you love me
God knows I do love you again

Out of Track

Missed me? *winks*

Well, yeah. I've been gone for too long. I am the title of this entry. Life has been very busy lately and I just couldn't find time to update my blog. I have also been thinking 'bout lots of things. Gawd! And I mean A LOT!

I might have the guts to share my recent thoughts here... some other time. So just keep posted. Haha! :p

That's all for now. I just want you to know I still exist... and by the way, I miss you too.

On Leave

I will not be online from January 22-24 because I will be very busy with the Quantum and IT Convention. I am actually one of the staff so just imagine how busy being one is. We are all so excited yet nervous! We are expecting 150+ delegates from four different schools in Mindanao. We hope this will be a great success!

Wish us good luck!

You Matter

I never thought you matter to me until I saw you today
You were so stunning, you left me with nothing to say
What are you doing, making me fall in love with you?

I never thought you matter to me until I had a bad dream
The pain felt so real and I thank God I woke up from it
What was it trying to say?

I never thought you matter to me until I saw you today with someone else
It was like my heart felt a sting
What happened to the things you once told me?

I never thought you still matter to me
Well, guess what?
Unfortunately, yes. You still do.


created: January 17, 2009 at 9:35 PM

Take Me To Boracay Island

Boracay is one of the places I wish to visit here in Philippines. It's actually a very famous tourist spot.

I wish someday I can go to this place, enjoy the beach, the white sand, the clear waters... Maybe I can go there when I already have a job. But then again, I still have to lose weight and look sexy before that happens. *laughs* I can't just wear shirt and shorts, right? Arggh.. All I can do is imagine that I'm wearing a two-piece swimsuit, walking by the beach, or enjoy sunbathing. There are also parties at night so people can drink and dance and have fun all night long. Wow. I love that! *laughs* Oh well... wishful thinking. Tsk tsk.. Someday, someday.. *sighs*

Flash Floods in Cagayan de Oro City

It seems that Cagayan de Oro City is having a bad start this year. Just last January 3, the Cagayan River raged and greatly affected residents nearby. Eight days after, almost all parts of the city were submerged due to constant heavy rains. We thought it was the worst. But we were wrong. Two days after, flash floods hit the city and more areas were affected. Thousands of people are still suffering because of the disaster. Many have lost their homes. There were also people buried alive due to landslides. The classes were also suspended this morning (which is the only good thing about having flash floods)... Anyway, here are sample pictures taken by two of my friends.

I have read from the news that the floods were caused by the tropical storm "Auring" and the continuous cold front. I never expected these things to happen here in CDO. I never expected it would be this worse. When I listen to the radio, all I hear is bad news. Floods here, landslides there, victims everywhere. Although I still thank God that we are safe here at home, I just can't help but worry and feel helpless about those thousands of people affected by the calamity. I just hope everything will be alright soon. Please help me pray.

ID Pictures in Business Attire

Me and Beverly

We had our picture taken at the studio this afternoon. As a requirement for graduating students, we have to wear a business attire for the ID picture. Since we were too tired to wear or bring with us our own business attire, we borrowed from the studio instead. And this is how it turned out. Both of us look almost the same! *laughs* We had a blast laughing at our pictures the moment we saw them upon claiming. Crazy! *laughs harder*

Hey! We're not sisters, okay? We're not twins! She's a very good friend. We're crazily happy together. *laughs*

New Year, New Hair

Hello, 2009!

So this is my first post for this year. As of the moment, I only have one thing to share with you. And that is all about having a new look. Me and my sister had our hairstyle changed last January 3. She got her formerly straight hair curled, and I got my formerly curly hair straightened. Cool, isn't it? We swapped hairstyles on the same day but in different places (she's in Singapore, I'm here in the Philippines). *laughs* Anyway, here are pictures for you to see our new hair for the new year.

above: ME ... below: my sister, Wendy

What do you think? *winks*